Mitchell
Who’s talking?

Scarlet
Back in the saddle. No.

Mitchell
No, we’re not doing the saddle. Not acceptable. We’re back though, doing the most, episode 37.

It’s a prime number. I don’t know what that means Yeah, no? You don’t that’s a big sigh.

Okay, well I’m Mitchell. That’s Carla. We’re doing the most we’re doing the most on this podcast.

We’re doing the most today. We’re getting her going, yeah? You got you prepared this week.

That’s the word on the street, right?

Scarlet
Well, I mean we kind of

Mitchell
What?

Scarlet
Had an event.

Mitchell
We did. Do you want to hear about a quick event though really quick that I had? Uh it’s two forty five PM Pacific Standard Time.

It doesn’t matter. Now when this is going out. Oh, about an hour and fifteen minutes go you you were rough, roughly then.

You were Doing your treadmill thing and I was on the I was in the shower and I had just eaten And I was in the shower and I was like, oof. I was like, man, I am feeling some nausea. I was like, oof, nausea.

And I was like, ah, I was like, and I just taken, I haven’t taken any supplements for a long time. I was like, oh thank and I take in my supplements. But I didn’t take um zinc.

I didn’t uh I don’t have the zinc in there. But I was just like, oof. And I’m in the shower and I’m wrapping it up and I’m like, man, this nausea is palpable and I thought, oh this is just like nausea.

That’s it. It’s not gonna It’s not blossoming. And then I started thinking about how nausea is like nausea sits at that level, but like you feel like you’re gonna throw up, but you’re not throwing up until you go to that new level, which is the Now your mouth is like doing that thing, right?

Scarlet
Mm-hmm.

Mitchell
So I’m like, oh wow, I think I’m getting that feeling now. So I quickly bust out of the shower and I’m like holding uh being your towel, but I’m holding it like on the floor so I don’t drip everywhere to get over to the toilet.

Scarlet
Oh that’s where my towel went.

Mitchell
Yeah And then I proceeded to vomit two ton of apparently just romaine and uh so it actually just looked like uh Chewed up it looked like pesto. I filled the toilet with pesto because I had a little salad dressing on it, so there’s a little oil. I filled the toilet with pesto multiple times And then I could see some capsules in there.

And then I was just like, I did have that moment. I was like, oh, so I hope, I hope it was the supplements. Not the romaine, which is out of our garden, ’cause I was like, oh but I’ve had some of this romaine before.

I don’t I we did change. With cyclosporolosis or whatever it is, everyone’s concerned. So um anyway.

So

Scarlet
Well, do you feel better?

Mitchell
Uh I do. Sorry, but I don’t currently feel better because I don’t see some things on the uh here on the recording, but that’s okay. Keep talking.

Scarlet
Do you need a minute?

Mitchell
It’s alright. No. So I do feel better, so I’m hoping it’s not a stomach bug. I really think it’s all the supplements. Although I took ’em with food, these are ones I have taken before with food. That’s why I’m kinda Concerned, not concerned.

Scarlet
Maybe lettuce wasn’t enough food.

Mitchell
uh for what I was eating.

Scarlet
Yeah, maybe it should be like take with protein.

Mitchell
Anyways, and we’re okay on the recording. Sorry, I’m looking at the wrong thing.

Scarlet
Oh.

Mitchell
So that was my exciting just recent event, but It was touch and go and I for a moment I I actually was like, should I get a snap of this? This is so much like custody looking stuff. It didn’t look like vomit.

And then later I thought ‘Cause it had splashed out. I was like, I might need to just take an redo the shower. I did not.

And then I thought, You’re gonna come in there and be like, Oh my goodness, did he have diarrhea that’s just green leafy everywhere? In case you see any. I tried to clean it all up but Exciting.

Scarlet
So why don’t you know if I looked in the toilet, so That’s all right.

Mitchell
Ca I mean I tried to make sure it was clean, but that was So I was kinda like, yeah, well, so much for those supplements. It’s trying to get back on the supplement train. Which never I’d had na na nausea before, but I’ve never vomited from taking capsules until today.

Anyway, and it was like I think it was three rounds of emissions. You know what I mean? Like it wasn’t just one cleared me.

It was like, oh, and I was like, I had to keep doing more. I was like, please, no why So I was soaking well, which probably helped keep me cool instead of getting all vomiting. But anyways, there we go.

That was really not important, however, because I haven’t vomited in quite some time. And I’m not Lamenting that I’m just like oof, I forget how there’s that middle zone where you’re like in the in you’re in the thick of vomiting.

Scarlet
I don’t like that middle zone.

Mitchell
And you’re like, I’m not sure if you’re not going to be able to do that. I think I Don’t should I call someone? I want someone here to help me because I hate this.

This moment right now is the worst. But got through it. So anyway.

Scarlet
Yeah.

Mitchell
Alright, let’s move on to the we need to just get to the core topic of episode 37, right?

Scarlet
Okay, well we’ve probably talked about this before, but it’s been long enough. Where it’s probably been forgotten about. And who cares?

Mitchell
Or you can’t.

Scarlet
People have podcasts. They talk about the same stuff all the time anyway.

Mitchell
Every day on their podcast.

Scarlet
Yeah. So I I’ve realized I’m a terrible hostess. Like I I don’t love having visitors.

I don’t love it. I’m not a person who is like Welcome to my home. Here’s a gift bag.

Let me cook you dinner.

Mitchell
What else can I do for you? Put your laundry here. I’ll get that for ya.

Scarlet
Not that you’ve done that or do that, but I mean what I did do though n and my brother came to visit. Yeah. Which so That was the big event.

Mitchell
Yeah. Your your brother. Which you knew about. I mean this was ahead of time.

Scarlet
He usually sleeps in the den slash Mitchell’s office, but this time I was like studio. Yeah. I was like, we’re not gonna do that ’cause Mitchell likes to have his private space. It’s his the it’s your escape space.

Mitchell
Right.

Scarlet
It is. So it’s and I get that. That’s fine.

Mitchell
Like when I get up in the morning, this is usually the there’s like the first place I just our bedroom is my escape space.

Scarlet
So if our bedroom were to be occupied all the time, I would be like where where am I gonna go? Yeah. So I was like, no problem Mitchell, why don’t we just let Max sleep in our room because what’s the big deal?

Mitchell
Right.

Scarlet
Like he’s a good sleeper. We only sleep in there, you know. Um He Max only uses his room to sleep in, otherwise he’s not really in there.

Mitchell
Right.

Scarlet
So we moved his bed into our room for a few nights. It went pretty well.

Mitchell
Yeah Then your brother could have Max’s room as his little space.

Scarlet
Yeah.

Mitchell
So he had a safe space or a six But anyways

Scarlet
So and this is like nothing on I mean this really isn’t anything on other people like I I enjoy going to other people’s No, I don’t.

Mitchell
Yeah. I wasn’t I was waiting to see where that was going. I was like, oh man. Okay, well let me write let me write this down. No.

Scarlet
Where was this going? I was gonna say I like to go to people’s house. I like okay. I like to go to a party where people are like, welcome to our home. Here’s

Mitchell
Let us take care of you like here’s our casa sue casa.

Scarlet
Here’s a gift bag.

Mitchell
Like A gift bag you did say you didn’t like it.

Scarlet
I don’t know why I’m talking about gifts.

Mitchell
Yeah, what’s his gift bag thing? Who’s how many what did you ra we I think you might have been raised in a what uh hotel?

Scarlet
Okay. I guess like And I don’t know. Okay, I watched a TikTok where it was like, you know, the ideal hostess, you you go to a party.

And y you know, they they have like a bartender and it’s an open bar and they ha you know, and you’re having a barbecue and a It’s like, you know, all you can eat food, all kinds of food and fancy seafood and blah blah blah. And on your way out, they have like personalized gifts. That’s like Thank you for coming to our party.

Like a little succulent. Yeah, like a little party favor.

Mitchell
So that’s what that’s what I mean. Okay.

Scarlet
So that’s not me. I’m not the one throwing that party. But I wouldn’t I would like to go to that party.

Which But I’m not gonna be throwing that party. I’m a giver is that bad? I would say I’m a giver to probably my closest friends.

Mitchell
Yeah. No, I’m not arguing.

Scarlet
I just in my head I’m thinking like And like loved ones Right?

Mitchell
Like you ’cause there are some people who really like hosting and throwing parties. And you’re not going to be able to do that.

Scarlet
audience.

Mitchell
And you like the experience of going to a hosted party.

Scarlet
But I’m not gonna be that person.

Mitchell
And you’re not a kind of yeah. You’re not a hostess, naturally.

Scarlet
No. So and cause I’m more just like oh you’re wearing your shoes in my house. Oh You’re touching why are you touching that? Why is why is your kid touching that? Why are you leaving my toilet lid up? Yeah, you are It’s not that hard

Mitchell
Right. You and here’s a quick question though. So do you think that’s a reflection of how the guest that you are?

Do you know what you hold yourself to the standard that you feel like this kinda I don’t want to call it the golden rule, right? But you go I go to someone’s house as a guest. And and by the way, put a pin in.

Does it matter? Does family with family should you be a better guest and a better host or a worse guest? Should you be more forgiving or more expect more?

Put a pin in that So when you go to someone’s house as a guest, you’re like when or when someone’s like, excuse me, a guest in your home, our home, you think of it as Well when I’m at someone else’s house, I make a mental note. When I go in, I might notice that oh they do put their toilet seat down Okay. And if that’s not your way, you’re like, I’ll make sure I do that.

Oh, I see that they do take their shoes off. I noticed that ’cause I could see the shoes. I’ll do that too.

Scarlet
Always pay attention to the show.

Mitchell
Right, that’s what I’m saying.

Scarlet
So then I when we went to Kelly’s, I was like What are people doing? Shoes on, shoes off.

Mitchell
Right.

Scarlet
They left their shoes on.

Mitchell
And then right saying I was asking, oh, should I might be a little drippy ’cause we had the water room flight. I wanted to be like I was like, Oh, should you want me to like and they’re and of course her husband’s offering me clothes. So I can go home dry, but I was like, no, I just don’t want to be like going into your home if you’re if you’re sitting there later having a podcast episode about us visiting your home getting that carpet wet or something. But like so it I do you feel like that comes from the reason you’re high of a higher standard for others is because that’s how you are in others’ homes

Scarlet
Yeah.

Mitchell
Or I mean or do you or is that what you say to yourself, like, Jamie, it’s not that hard, people. Like when you go to someone’s house and you notice that I don’t know Whatever it is. They they use paper towels to dry their hands or something like you just go, okay, I guess I’ll roll with that.

Scarlet
Like that’s like it’s it’s a couple things. It’s I hold myself to a higher standard and I feel like My pattern recognition is on a higher level than other people’s. So for example I love my brother. He’s not gonna listen to this podcast.

Mitchell
We hope.

Scarlet
Which is fine. I don’t get offended by that, as opposed to your family who listens to it religiously, who I’ve gotten a lot of trouble in the past with other podcasts. But even if he were to listen to this, he he is not the kind who would get mad and hold a grudge and call me crying and boo-hooing.

Mitchell
That is not him. Which is another funny thing.

Scarlet
Yeah. So um You’re driving down the street, you’re parking, you’re gonna park on the street, and you notice all the cars, I notice all the cars on the street are parked a certain way. So the cars on the right side of the street are parked facing forward.

Mitchell
The flow of traffic.

Scarlet
The flow of traffic. Let’s just say that to keep it simple. The cars are parked facing the flow of traffic.

My brother only car in the frickin’ street. who is not facing the flow of traffic with his rental car. Just just pulls in.

And and it drives me intern you, you and me both internally insane. Because I’m just like, how do you not look around? How how are you not seeing that?

And I and I looked the other day and I was like, I’m just gonna look down the street and see if any other car No other car, no other car was parked facing opposite the flow of traffic except for him.

Mitchell
Right.

Scarlet
And I’m I’m just like where does that I’m like I just feel like I would I feel like every time I’m I’m looking at what look looking at how other people are what is what is the norm What are the things that are going on? How can I follow suit? How can I be better? Or how can I even do it better?

Mitchell
Right.

Scarlet
So even when we go to my dad’s and we stay at my dad’s Right. He doesn’t have a dishwasher, but and some dishes might pile up in the sink throughout the day, but by nighttime Those dishes are hand washed and they are put to the side and they are dry by the morning and I try to put them away every single night. I don’t let them pile up because I just hold myself to that standard Or the towels are hanging. They’re not laying in the floor.

Mitchell
Right.

Scarlet
Um, you know, there’s not wo like washcloths just like piling up at the bottom of the shower. They’re like hanging up to dry or There’s not clothes wadded up in the floor. They’re in a hamper.

Just like things like that, the same way I live my life, if not better, when I’m at someone else’s. Right. House. Because and even though my dad would be like probably like I don’t care.

It’s what I’m like, yeah, but I do. I care.

Mitchell
Right

Scarlet
Why do I I no I don’t even know why I care, but and then I hold other people to the standard I hold myself to. And then when they don’t live up to that standard, I’m And that’s on me too.

Mitchell
With him even though it’s a well it’s it’s interesting because I too go through that. Because you go like, hmm

Scarlet
Oh, this is where I say at least with family, because I go It sucks that we’re both like this.

Mitchell
Should family be extra should so here’s where I’m like this is always like I can’t find the sweet metal, I’m only extreme. So like On the one hand you go, well family should be even more forgiving ’cause they’re your family. Like you should not have to worry so much when you stay with family or when family stays with everyone should be the lower like It’s totally like, no, it’s it’s family.

You don’t need to but then on the other very other side of this pendulum is like, well no, it’s it’s family. You should like you should be like a higher, even a higher like level of like, yeah, I Because I appreciate you, like you should also maybe be on a higher tier because you’re like, this ain’t a hotel, this ain’t a throw, who cares? It’s more like, hey, I wanna Th and that’s sometimes like that’s how my dad sometimes is.

He’ll be like, You should be treating your family even better than you treat strangers. Like that should be, you know, but I sometimes go like, oh, but with family should you be able to be like I don’t know. And I’m not arguing one way or the other.

I’m saying that’s the kind of strangeness where you go, like, should the family member be able to be more at ease? But then that’s sometimes you go like how did we come out of the same family, right? You go, how did this person and I both raise in the same home and yet This person totally like yeah, wet towel just hanging on a piece of furniture and I don’t know.

I’m just throwing like random things at you.

Scarlet
I know because you’ve seen my mom’s place like just

Mitchell
So maybe you’re an odd one in your family.

Scarlet
Um my dad’s definitely more you’ve seen but night and day. My my mom and dad night and day. She is just Borderline hoarder. Maybe a hoarder. Okay.

Mitchell
What I’m thinking about uh, you know, the traits that you do and don’t have from your family. And from which Okay, borderline horror.

Scarlet
And same with you.

Mitchell
And that borderline is getting pretty fuzzy, right?

Scarlet
Yeah.

Mitchell
For me. For me, I’m saying I might be a borderline hoarder. I’m like, I might just be a hoarder. Anyways.

Scarlet
And then my dad is like, he barely has any furniture.

Mitchell
Yeah. I kinda like it.

Scarlet
And everything is very or like very minimalist, very organized.

Mitchell
It’s almost too far that way because you’re like, oh there’s two chairs and one table.

Scarlet
Yeah, and you’re like, do you have any pots and pans? And he’s had he’s like, I have this one. Pan. And you’re like, okay.

Mitchell
It’s uh it’s a it’s a eight inch frying pan.

Scarlet
I guess we’re not doing stairs and borrow something from me, Ma. And I’m like, uh alright Oh, I just lost my That’s alright. There we go.

Um so yeah, maybe I should stop banging on the table. But anyway, so I don’t know. I I my brother I love my brother, but him visiting it’s not as bad as it used to be.

Mitchell
Right.

Scarlet
When he was dating that girl

Mitchell
Mm-hmm.

Scarlet
It was incredibly difficult because then it was like having two of them here. So and But that’s like Well and then it brings up like a And he’s he’s pretty neat, but then there was like the glasses everywhere.

Mitchell
The cup the cups everywhere. The kids do that too.

Scarlet
And then I’m worried about his weed brain.

Mitchell
Oh, like maybe So forgetful. Maybe some of this isn’t how he is normally. This is just well how he’s become.

Scarlet
My brother smokes a lot of weed.

Mitchell
Right.

Scarlet
I think he smokes more weed than he lets on to me and he doesn’t want to tell me ’cause he knows how I feel about it.

Mitchell
Right.

Scarlet
Clinically as a nurse. So so Yeah. Um I see the forgetfulness.

I’ve been seeing it for years. Right. And I’ve tried to dismiss it as He he’s absent-minded.

Right. I don’t even know what absent-minded means. I grew up with my dad always saying, Oh, your mom’s just absent-minded and she I don’t even know what that means really.

I don’t even know if that’s a real term or just something my dad made up. And now I’m just saying it.

Mitchell
No, it’s a real term. I’ve heard that because the helps of mine are professor But it also absent mind is interesting because is it a actual like are people really just s super forgetful about basic life things and we call it absent minded Or have everybody just given them a pass so they’ve never had to learn how to just like notice and commit a few simple tasks to like Listen, you know what? Put your car keys somewhere like if you’re losing your car keys every day.

Scarlet
If we’ve lost our car keys, something has gone terribly wrong because we have them in the same spot All of the time. So either Max has taken them out of my sorry, my nose is itching. Yes.

Either Max has taken them out of my purse, which he knows to never do because he did it one time. Well that was actually my wallet. He did it one time and we got to the store and it was gone and I had a conniption and he learned okay, don’t ever touch stuff in mama’s purse.

So and he know and he knows to hang the keys up and he knows which hook to hang them on.

Mitchell
So and and the reason real quick is if you don’t if you don’t use a key hook thing or whatever in your life You’re wasting you’re wasting time trying to um remember where stuff is. And that’s what I do. It’s like if I offload stupid menial tasks to ritual or to uh pattern that’s standard, I don’t have to worry about it. So I’m not saying I wouldn’t be absent minded. I it’s just like, you know, but your brother His keys I mean I don’t know how many times they were.

Scarlet
Should I just leave them here?

Mitchell
Right.

Scarlet
Or is that where I’m gonna be I know I’m like maybe he was like I’m gonna be nice and put them on the shoe rack. Our shoe rack is a shelf. I’m gonna put them on the shelf at eye level so he sees them.

Right. And s n I don’t know. It it is very concerning to me though because I don’t know people out there who have friends who smoke weed or who they themselves smoke a lot of weed.

But I’m very curious if there is a because there are studies coming out Clinical studies in medical journals that are showing connections between frontotemporal dementia and the use of marijuana.

Mitchell
Specifically THC. So that’s that what it or is it just marijuana in the study?

Scarlet
Well, marijuana THD.

Mitchell
Why no? I’m just saying that because people will sometimes have THC tincture oils, etc.

Scarlet
And he smokes it. So he claims to be a healthy person on a health journey. But he smoked it.

So I did have to address that with him when in the past he would get super, super um What now I’m drawing blank. No. He defensive. Defensive.

Okay. In the past he would get really defensive about it. And you know, bring up, well, you drink alcohol and that’s way worse than blah blah blah.

Okay. Sure. Uh I guess.

Mitchell
But you don’t have a persistent cough because of your alcohol use, do you?

Scarlet
No. Um and I don’t know. Like I I just had to talk to him about that because that’s probably my biggest thing is like it’s still smoke, inhalation, into your lungs. So just because it’s not cigarettes doesn’t make it any better for you.

Mitchell
Right.

Scarlet
And then he gets the oh I know. Oh I know. Oh I know. Oh I know, oh I know. Well, I read somewhere that it’s not um you know as bad and the bad stuff in tobacco you can’t you know you don’t cough up and and I was just like okay I don’t know what you’re reading but I feel like you’re looking at stuff to confirm your bias.

Mitchell
Right

Scarlet
And you’re always gonna do that. And he he’s he’s always done that. He’s been like, you know, uh always looked up stuff being like, it show me that weed is good for Anxiety. And there’s probably plenty of studies showing the opposite as well.

Mitchell
Yeah. Well yeah.

Scarlet
Or whatever. So it’s really frustrating to me. And So I have my own vices and I have a couple glasses of wine after five PM on most days.

Mitchell
Right.

Scarlet
So There is that. Sorry people.

Mitchell
Right.

Scarlet
So not perfect.

Mitchell
Which is it’s okay to admit like hey I love wine.

Scarlet
I’m always gonna be a little fat because I love wine

Mitchell
Yeah, okay. Good times. And I love Oreos.

Um do they make Oreo wine? Mm Although, like it doesn’t matter. Oreos, yeah, I won’t go there.

Um, so you uh hear a concern about him, absent mindedness versus is he just can’t like maintain a persistent like true line in life of like, oh, hey, I noticed when I’m here I’ll I’m gonna do things this way just to respect the home that I’m visiting with and then like Like it’s funny and not funny because he knows we have a thing about closing the toilet. Yeah. Because of the cats.

It really is.

Scarlet
That’s one thing. But also I am really grossed out by people who don’t double flush

Mitchell
Mm-hmm.

Scarlet
After certain events.

Mitchell
Um tripled today after vomiting.

Scarlet
Yeah. So like it’s a thing for me.

Mitchell
And I just grew up using the lid because it’s like it’s on the toilet. If you don’t use the lid on a toilet, my question might be like what do you think that lid should be?

Scarlet
And I didn’t grow up using the lid, but somewhere along life You’re like I figured out that it was a polite thing to do.

Mitchell
Yeah.

Scarlet
It’s just like Do we do it in our bathroom all the time? No. Because it’s our space. Space. Where That only you and I use.

Mitchell
Right. I’m not sure.

Scarlet
But the commonly used bathrooms, a hundred percent. Where the cats can go and be like Kennedy is obsessed with water.

Mitchell
He will go and he’ll go and splash around. And he did when there was an unflushed toilet once.

Scarlet
And my brother knows He knows we have a thing, but every time, every single time the lid was open And I would know, because I’d go in the bathroom and I’d be like, he’s been done here. Even Max knows. Max knows. Max has been well trained.

Mitchell
So I could play devil’s advocate. It’s like, oh, well no, I’m not because I because sometimes I I can imagine a listener going, what’s the big deal? Like was so what? So like you had to put up with your family for a few days and big deal they left the to it’s just a toilet lid. It’s just uh parking uh backwards on the street. It’s just Um, whatever it is, you know, it’s just a musty towel hanging on a piece of furniture in because the towel rack apparently doesn’t it’s just

Scarlet
Uh I’ve always I’ve already had these conversations in the shower of being like, wow, these are really mean people who are talking very saying really mean things about their own family member. And I’m just like, I feel like we’re probably all having these conversations in our head when we have visitors or when we’re talking to a family member because we’re having the same conversation about a bad relationship that they’re in or something.

Mitchell
Right

Scarlet
We’re just saying the quiet part out loud.

Mitchell
But the other part is like, well maybe your brother should step up his game and be like, you know what, in my life I don’t do these things, but I’m grateful to be here. And it’s not that hard just to do these simple little things. It’s that classic like It’s just a little thing and then you could go, That’s right, so it shouldn’t be too hard to do. Right. You know, like there’s a kind of mentally interesting like area

Scarlet
And then sometimes you go Oh yes, I did not remind him about the toilet because I was just like, I gotta pick my battles.

Mitchell
Well, I I don’t I try to I fixed I was like he fixed our ceiling.

Scarlet
Yes. That’s kinda that’s what I kept coming back to guys, because he actually We had had a hole in our ceiling.

Mitchell
See the episode about the shower drain being fixed, which left a hole.

Scarlet
For how many months?

Mitchell
I don’t know. The hole’s been there for probably eight months.

Scarlet
Yeah.

Mitchell
I don’t even know why I fixed it.

Scarlet
And he did a really great job fixing it.

Mitchell
Fantastic.

Scarlet
So I was kind of in this space where I was like, okay, he did it for free.

Mitchell
Mm-hmm.

Scarlet
And I’m so appreciative and he did a really great job.

Mitchell
Yeah. It’s his trade.

Scarlet
So he And I was yeah. And I was just like, so I can’t like bringing bringing any of this up is gonna make me sound like a really crappy person. To be like, um so thanks for doing that.

Mitchell
But but however

Scarlet
You did this and this and this and this. And we’ve specifically told you in the past to not do that.

Mitchell
So next visit though, if he doesn’t do something like that, then do you feel like you’ll have Like that’s also a weird place to be. Again, I’m not arguing one way or the other. I’m saying like that’s weird because yeah, sometimes you’re like, well, I can’t complain because they did something nice, but They didn’t do something nice because I asked them to. It just happened to be, but now I feel bound by this unspoken nice

Scarlet
Thing so like next time do you just go like hey See I’ve confronted him about it before and he’s lied to me. I’m like, do you just like leave the toilet lid open at your house all the time just for your poop particles just to like fly into the air when you flush and he’s light.

Mitchell
Hmm.

Scarlet
Because he’s like he’s caught. He’s like, oh no

Mitchell
And I’m like Oh okay and then do you okay then ’cause I sometimes well I also flip this. So when you have a visitor in your home and you these things like they’re like, oh my goodness. Now if he had been here for two weeks, there probably would have been like Some crash and burn uh claws and fisticuffs kind of a thing.

Scarlet
If he’s here for more than like six days there’s always eventually some sort of the tension comes to a head and it usually ends up being about weed, but it’s not really about weed. And then You know, then it then it it it turns into like him being forgetful and just being like, well Clay, you didn’t do this and this and this and I’m worried about your state of mind and blah blah blah blah blah. Right.

So Yeah. So and I’m not anti-we uh this makes me sound like I’m anti-weed. You do you, but my brother has been smoking All day, every day, multiple times a day, sun up to sundown, for probably at least fifteen years?

Mitchell
Is he did he start in seventeen, eighteen years old?

Scarlet
I wanna say at least ten years.

Mitchell
At least a decade of

Scarlet
‘Cause he’s thirty-two, gonna be twenty-two. That that might be too long, but uh eight eight years I wanna say.

Mitchell
Near daily or daily for sure.

Scarlet
And he lives a life that doesn’t require a whole lot of like critical thinking.

Mitchell
Right.

Scarlet
So that’s probably also not helpful.

Mitchell
Right.

Scarlet
As where we have to kind of be on our game and our jobs and stuff. Yeah, I can’t afford to so that also might not be too helpful because my you know like my dad he works for my dad He, you know, pays his mortgage to my dad. He a lot of things just fall back on my dad for him as where we Have student loans and we have a mortgage and we have like this really sounds bad, but we have like adult responsibilities.

Mitchell
Right.

Scarlet
And he Is like adult light.

Mitchell
Oh my I mean and I know and he’s he’s wonderful and funny in so many good qualities. Is this I’ve said what I said. Is this part of that larger picture of kids his age? Kids he’s thirty-two. Men his age who are kinda like

Scarlet
Not I would say the genera the the generations after him are like even worse off.

Mitchell
Worse, okay. ‘Cause like you know, he might be like

Scarlet
A little bit kind of pulling out of that, but he I’ve always wanted more for him and he’s known that. Right. And he’s always just settled And now he’s basically told me while he was here, he was like, You’ve s you’ve said I’ve just settled, but but I’m How did he word it?

He was just like, no, this is my calling in life is to to stay to stay in our hometown. and to work for our dad and to learn the trade. And you know what?

I think that’s that’s fine. I feel like there’s always one that has there’s always one kid that has to stay back. And in your case that was you.

Mitchell
Well.

Scarlet
And um his case that’s him.

Mitchell
Right.

Scarlet
And Well, I was the daughter who left and never went back.

Mitchell
Well look at you.

Scarlet
Anyway, so I I can go on and on.

Mitchell
Right, right. Well this usually though. I mean I know we got we got we’re all against the time crunch.

However, when so F Just kind of, you know, like one not 180, but like that, you know after an experience like this, it makes me think about, well, what would what do my family think of me or say And then that’s you’ll like they might not say anything, like, oh we don’t know. We don’t care we don’t care about this stuff, which then makes me feel like a horrible person. Or do they And what am I doing?

Am I being observant enough? It’s not like I’m preoccupied with being observant at someone else’s house. I feel like that’s just part of how I am.

Maybe that’s that hypervigilance where you’re like I don’t have to it’s not like a lot of effort for me to notice things. I do that, that’s just what I do. Right?

I I see details, right So I don’t know if I do things or if they’re like, man, he makes this crazy because he does everything exactly like we do. Can’t he just be his own person? I don’t know.

But it makes me think, okay, how can I make sure No one’s making a podcast about me after I visit the house. But I you know but then I go back to the other side, which is like so who cares? Should it matter?

I don’t know

Scarlet
I don’t I don’t know.

Mitchell
You don’t have the answer.

Scarlet
But it I can say I can say it probably shouldn’t matter. I can say that

Mitchell
Right.

Scarlet
But in in life, in real life, it will still matter to me.

Mitchell
Yeah. And interestingly enough, because we’re is it because you’re like It’s is it a control thing? Is it like he should be putting the toilet seat down, just as an example, like put the lid down.

Is it that hard? Can you just not do that And he’s like, ha ha ha, I’m not gonna do it. Does he remember enough to not do it to be like but it is so that is a stran that’s a strange example?

Him and your mom Consistently leave the lids up and you’ve told you you in other words, you’ve told them half a dozen times every visit, hey can you not do it just for you know and you use what you throw whatever in Yeah, you know, oh you have a little toddler, you don’t want Max to go in there at the time. Or the cats, or just in general, you try to like come up with reasons to help them remember and yet They not they will never. Your mother will never be able to get it.

Scarlet
And I feel like I feel like somebody could tell me something once. Okay, oh yeah, and that would be enough for me to be like, I’m never gonna I’m never gonna forget that.

Mitchell
Chick.

Scarlet
Yeah I got that not them. Nope. Nope. Never gonna remember. Never.

Mitchell
Yep. Like check, we don’t use this towel for whatever it’s for X-Ros and not them. Not them. Thank you. We’ll do Roger that.

Scarlet
They’re just thinking about the next thing that they’re gonna like that’s it’s crazy. It’s wild to me. It is wild to me. Oh I’m sorry I’m sorry. I feel very intensely about this.

Mitchell
I can tell. Well it’s been a good talk about being a guest and a host and whatever.

Scarlet
Yeah, we might continue this next time.

Mitchell
Yeah. There’s more to be said. Or not Or more to think about. Well, I mean, you know, I’m glad you, you know I am.

Scarlet
I’m sure we’ll have more to talk about because now we’re gonna next we’re gonna be traveling next week and we’re gonna be staying Airbnbs and so we’ll probably have stuff to talk about

Mitchell
And I had one comment it was about the four seasons, but it’s not a comment, but we’ll do it next time.

Scarlet
Oh.

Mitchell
It’s about the kind of w that wasn’t the finale, was it?

Scarlet
I

Mitchell
Oh yeah, it was about the finale of season two. Okay. All right, well.

Scarlet
Okay, until next time, I’m Scarlet.

Mitchell
I’m Mitchell.

Both
And we’re doing the most. Bye.